Lesbian kiss falls flatter than a pancake

Posted on Fri, Mar. 16, 2007
Lesbian kiss falls flatter than a pancake
By MIKE HENDRICKS
Columnist





Just one kiss. That’s all it took — to get thrown out of the IHOP in Grandview.

“It was a kiss I would share with my uncle,” Blair Funk told me. Except it wasn’t her uncle she kissed. It was her honey, Eva Sandoval.

Two young women sharing a kiss didn’t seem inappropriate to the other couple in the restaurant booth that night, Jackie Smith and the woman with whom she shares her life, Toni Smith. But someone watching the scene was offended.

So later, the manager confronted them in the lobby and told them to get out.

The way Blair tells it, “He said, ‘I have to tell you, we’ve had some complaints about public displays of affection, and we’re a family restaurant. We can’t accept it, and we won’t accept it.’

“The way he worded it was like: We don’t accept you.”

These days it’s rare for gays and lesbians to be denied service in restaurants for acting like who they are. Blair assures me that she and Eva did nothing that wouldn’t have been appropriate for a man and a woman to do at a dinner date. No heavy makeout. No groping.

However, incidents like this one are not unheard of, and the people affected often can do nothing about it.

There is no federal law prohibiting discrimination based on sexual orientation. Neither Kansas nor Missouri are among the few states that protect gay people from being discriminated against in areas of employment, housing and public accommodations.

Kansas City does have an ordinance protecting gays, as do St. Louis, Columbia and University City. But if you’re anywhere else in Missouri and you’re gay, you can legally be denied service in restaurant. Landlords can refuse to rent you a place to live.

You can even be canned from your job on the suspicion that you’re romantically inclined toward members of your own sex.

“Many people are shocked to hear that people can be fired from their jobs for being gay or being perceived to be gay,” says Julie Brueggemann, executive director of the Missouri gay rights group Promo.

That would change if bills pending in Kansas and Missouri would ever pass. It’s only the first year for Senate Bill 163 in Kansas. But the so-called Missouri Nondiscrimination Act, House Bill 819, has been up time and again.

And as in past years, it has almost zero chance in Jefferson City, says Rep. Jeneé Lowe, a Kansas City Democrat, the bill’s sponsor.

“It’s surprising to me,” Lowe says, “how many people think there’s federal legislation. But there is no law.”

No law, but there is power in public opinion. So the night that she and her friends were evicted from the restaurant, Jackie Smith started tapping furiously on her computer keyboard.

E-mails to the media yielded a TV report on Fox 4, as well as a call from me.

Promo and other civil rights groups responded with support. IHOP was apologetic.

“Thank you for taking the time to contact us concerning your experience at the IHOP in Grandview,” began the letter from someone identifying himself as the guest services representative at the company’s headquarters in Glendale, Calif.

“We are sorry to learn of the difficulties you encountered at this location. Please be assured that the matter will be shared with the proper individuals to address your concerns.”

When I called the Grandview restaurant for comment I was told to ring the company headquarters. But the P.R. director there failed to return my phone calls. However, I can tell you that the restaurant chain wants Blair, Eva, Jackie and Toni to come back for pancakes sometime.

“It is our hope,” the guest services rep wrote, “that you will once again allow us to earn your patronage.”

Jackie isn’t ruling it out entirely.

“But it’s not likely,” she said.


To reach Mike Hendricks, call (816) 234-7708, or send e-mail to mhendricks@kcstar.com.







© 2007 Kansas City Star and wire service sources. All Rights Reserved.